someguy2000fandomcom-20200214-history
New Vegas Killer (quest)
}} New Vegas Killer is the one and only quest in New Vegas Killer, and is a non-canon questline to a "what-if" path that Someguy created. The quest takes place after New Vegas Bounties I, provided that the Courier decided to accept the Judge's deal and join in his organisation, showing just what would've happened had there actually been a storyline if the player decided to join the enemy. The quest introduces the character of Bobby Bass, who never makes a physical appearance in the canonical quest line but is mentioned. The mod showcases characters that were made for the sake of humour and some are noticeably references to real life people and other cultural references. All of the voiced characters are played by Someguy, and a majority of the mod was made while he was drunk. Detailed Walkthrough Hope you're happy with yourself After making the dick move of joining the Judge's organisation and being given a bullshit signing bonus, you are prompted to meet with Bobby Bass, the Judge's chief of contract killing. Bobby's office is located northwest of the 188 Trading Post, head on over there and meet with the dick head. Bobby will introduce himself, enduring the pleasure of meeting you after being sent the paperwork, acknowledging that even though you killed Javier Sugar, you decided to let the grudge you had for the Judge go, which he is extremely pleased about as it makes you a "good character", which he plans to take advantage of. Bobby can also reveal that he hated Javier Sugar, revealing that during the variety of long meetings the organisation would have, he'd always see Javier staring at him with a look that made it apparent he wanted to cut Bobby's throat, even when trying to start a nice conversation about sex, it still wouldn't conjure a pleasant conversation between the two, which Bobby speculated it was due to the accident Javier had one night when he would sleep with his shotgun and accidentally got his penis stuck in the chamber, which lead to it coming out scarred If you don't want to hear Bobby jabber on with his godforsaken life stories, opinions and speculation, you can tell him that you want to work on the job right away, which he will give you a hit on a man named Pat who is currently in Goodsprings, who he wants dead for "being way too nice" which makes everyone "uncomfortable and awkward", if you sat there and listened to his annoying ass, he'll give you a silenced .22 pistol in order to "do the job right". Bobby can also tell you that unlike Randall, you don't have to collect fingers, the organisation has spies everywhere and they will know if you have killed a target or not. Before going on with the target, if you are mentally challenged, you can take up the time to ask Bobby some questions. Asking about himself, he refuses to chat about back stories like Randall would with you, but he'll only tell you that he comes from the East and nothing more, he'll also jabber on about almost getting eaten by deathclaws and getting "sucked up by a radioactive tornado", and then also says he came from the South after walking, living somewhere further from where Randall lived, and that his mother made biscuits, and then he can say that he came to Vegas for a woman with titties to make him biscuits, he did find a woman once who could make biscuits, but was flat chested, all the women with titties could cook and bake nothing, and that he's been walking all over the country trying to find the right woman, avoiding the Legion along the way, he goes on and on about other irrelevant shit and is so annoying... Asking about his silent slave in the building typing on the typewriter, he'll reveal him as Josiah Peep, whom he purchased from a "Raznick" and that he doesn't speak due to his tongue having been cut out years prior, other than that he is harmless. Asking about his plants, he claims that he enjoys watching things grow, that it reminds him of ejaculating in a woman's genitalia, except he cares not about having children and prefers to plant his seed in soil, as plants only need water and sunshine to be happy instead of having a soulmate who will constantly accuse you of cheating on her. Pat Going to Goodsprings, you will find Pat outside of the saloon alongside his protectron Colonel Angus. If you try to interact with Pat, he will awkwardly embrace you while grinning and humming, as he lets go, a long line of saliva will be found on your shoulder, you get the feeling that the townspeople are watching you, making this one of the most awkward moments in your life. Kill him in any fashion you see fit for embarrassing you, his protectron will turn hostile soon after, forcing you to kill 'em. Go to Bobby and let him know about Pat's fate, after jabbering as usual, Bobby gives you your reward, 150 caps. Reverend Hitchens You're next target is a preacher named Reverand Hitchens, a ghoul who constantly preaches about corruption, gambling, and other sorts of violent activities, he is wanted dead for having numerous orgies with other ghouls, Bobby will give you 12 .22LR hollow point bullets. Hitchens' First Church of the Eternal Flame can be found in Westside, head on over there. Going into the basement, you'll find Hitchens alongside his harem of Ghoul followers and two males, killing them all should be fairly easy. On Hitchens corpse you can find a note titled A Threat by a man named Robertson, alerting him about your presence. Going back to Bobby to submit the bounty, he is again grateful for taking care of the regular "nonsense" for him, claiming they can now get their own gun store. He gives you 300 caps. Jackie Freehorn Your next job is a "big one", a lazy pornographer named Jackie Freehorn who makes very bad porn which consists of bad acting, bad voicing, bad plots, etc. Only making the movies as a way of exploitation, so long as people will buy them, he'll make money. Judge Richter has informed Freehorn that he owns the area recently and that there is a toll, Freehorn has refused to pay, so they attempted to intimidate him with ways such as placing animal heads on his bed, but he will not change his mind, warranting his death, Bobby gives you another 12 .22LR hollow point bullets to do the job. Going to Freeside, you will find Freehorn at his business; Freehorn Studios. Heading inside you'll walk in on him in the middle of creating a porno, expecting you as a new fluffer he hired, however he immediately catches on that you're an assassin by Richter and immediately turns hostile along with his two fluffers with brass knuckles. Jackie does some damage with his .44 magnum, but his fluffers are a pain in the ass, so keep firing until they stop movin', ignore his porn stars as they do nothing. Before leaving, you will find a note on Jackie's corpse titled Be Vigilant, which is once again from this Robertson cucker. Go back to Bobby and inform him that the job is done, he will once again jabber on and reward you with 600 caps. Jorge Martin This next job is from Judge Richter himself, a novelist named Jorge Martin who makes novels on "dragons, swords, characters you like who die", and is living in Goodsprings. Martin is wanted dead for relaxing on his fatass and not bothering to finish the last book in his franchise, he hasn't got many years left in his life, which the Judge wants to speed up, once dead, they plan to have their "nerds" go in and collect all the drafts Martin made and finish the book themselves, allowing Richter & Associates to benefit from the profits. Go to Goodsprings and enter Jorge Martin's Home, he will immediately be hostile and will try fighting you off with his laser rifle, he is easy to kill, but watch out for his three dogs, Jaime, Jon and Tyrion. After killing him, go back to Bobby and hear him jabber on more before he gives you your reward, 900 caps. Bill Clooney Your next target is a defector to Richter & Associates, one of the bookworms decided to join the NCR and lay charges against the Judge as a witness, he is wanted dead before he can reach the trial, he is currently hiding in a safehouse north of the North Vegas Square, you have to kill him and his entire family to send a strong message, and to also prevent his kids from growing up into "ninjas" out to kill you. Going to the Witness Protection Safehouse you will find the outside guarded by three mercenaries, kill them and enter the place, which you will have two more mercenaries to kill before descending the steps to the basement, you will find Clooney and his family there, kill them all and you will lose -25 karma for killing each one. After you're done killing the Clooney family you sick fuck, go back to Bobby and let him know the job is done, he'll give you 1,200 caps. Pokey Collins This next job is something Bobby and the Judge always concur on, a homeless man named Pokey Collins, "hobo of the hobos" who is residing in the sewers with his army of homeless men ready to rise up. Go to Freeside and enter one of the sewage manholes, kill any hobos that get in your way as well as the guard dogs and ringleaders until you reach Pokey's Sanctuary. Once in the sanctuary, Pokey will lock you in the room and send in waves of hobos to attack, all while taunting you on the speaker in the room, on the fourth wave, he'll send in Blue Balls Paul who will try to burn you with his bloody flamethrower, and Willy Whistles on the fifth wave, and then Pokey Collins himself on the sixth wave. Go back to Bobby and he'll jabber on again and give you your reward as well as a bonus from the Judge, 1,600 caps. Dexler You're going after a doctor by the name of Dexler, a vigilante who kills people and takes their blood samples. Go to the Old Mormon Fort in Freeside and you will find the knife wielding doctor in Julie Farkas' residence, you cannot interact with him and he is non-hostile, so just take the opportunity to blow his arse away. Go back to Bobby and inform him that Dexler is dead, he promises to inform the Judge that you did an exceptional job and rewards you with 2,000 caps. Cunty McLean People have been leaving the ranks lately, including a mercenary named Cunty McLean, former Shadow Company member and is now looking to join the NCR, he is currently at the Mojave Outpost with his guards. Go to the outpost and enter the headquarters where two of his mercenaries will open fire on you, kill them and head to the back where you will find more guard and McLean himself, take the fucker down. Go back to Bobby and get your 2,500 caps. Django Westwood You're going after a well-known bounty hunter, who has been known since Steven Randall's time, named Django Westwood, who has killed more people than Marko and is currently taking residence in Goodsprings, he's apparently really hard to kill and Bobby recommends you stack up on chems and bring your companions. Upon arrival, Django will appear from behind a crate and tell you that "you done fucked yourself partner" and will turn hostile, he does alot of damage with his scripted revolver and is fast, so be careful. When you get back to Bobby, you will find Josiah replaced with a female secretary, Bobby will immensly praise you for doing the job and will inform the next one will be your last and big one, he rewards you with 3,500 caps. Before taking on the next contract, you can ask about Josiah, Bobby will inform you that it was found out that he was secretly giving away information to someone in the NCR, so they cut his testicles off and let the dogs eat him. Senator Robertson You're going after an NCR 5th district member named Senator Robertson, the same man who wrote the notes to Hitchens and Freehorn, who is apparently wanting to run for president which will allow him to run a platform on kicking Richter & Associates out of the Mojave. He is at the Ultra-Luxe Bathhouse, head on over there and be sure to pass the sneak check to keep your holdout weapons if you can, before entering the bathhouse, you'll encounter two NCR bodyguards with marksman carbines who you will have to kill in order to get to the room, take one of their carbines because you will be facing A LOT of guards, fire your way through the fuckers and murder Robertson on the spot. Go back to Bass and let him know it's over, he gives you 5,000 caps and tells you that it is now over, no mores job and no more people need killing, but hopes to work with you again (which will be never). And the quest is over. A funny quest, but a douche path. Kill Bobby if you want, just like AlChestBreach did. Deactivate this mod and load your latest save to the point where you face the Judge in New Vegas Bounties I and kill him so you can go back to the canonical storyline and play New Vegas Bounties II or Russell, do it now or I will fuck yo character up, lmfao. Notes *As mentioned above, the targets Bass sends you out to kill are references to real life people or other popular media, the following consist of: **Jackie Freehorn is a parody of Jackie Treehorn from The Big Lebowski. **Jorge Martin is based on George R. R. Martin, and the mention of his novels are based on A Song of Ice and Fire book series. The mention of him postponing the release of his final book is also a reference to the huge delay in Martin's release of The Winds of Winter and A Dream of Spring. **Dexler is based on the character Dexter from the TV show of the same name. The mention of him being a vigilante and taking blood samples references the character in the shows means to kill criminals in "constructive" ways. **Django Westwood is more than likely based on Django Unchained. *When being given the bounty toward Django Westwood, Bass makes a reference to AlChestBreach's companions. The line; "I don't care if it's a fucking roach, and a goddamn zombie with, with a rubber glove...", refers to Breach's companions, Steve and Jerry McGhoulBerry. Category:New Vegas Killer quest